Shadowrun Northside Barrens Weirdness

You see strange things when walking around the failed state that is the northside barrens. One of the Shadowrun Tools and Plots generators. Makes use of The Dungeon Dozen.

What the F?
[main]

1,Some [Oddments for Apocalypse World.oddments] sitting on a deserted looking table. 1,A roadside ditch with a(n) [Random Tools for Mutant Future.JUNK] in it. 1,A(n) [Weirdos] standing around a deserted street corner. 1,A wanted poster: [target], Wanted [wantedposter] stapled up on an old light post.
 * main

1,[American Census Names.male] [American Census Names.surname] (male) 2,[American Census Names.female] [American Census Names.surname] (female)
 * target

1,For treason: highly satirical bard with broad fan-base among the city's youth 2. For blasphemy: gaggle of impish street waifs who seem to delight in defacing holy sites 3. For adultery: wanton spouse of city official, now in hiding w/one of many lovers 4. For loan racketeering: extremely clever and elusive Masked Money-changer, protected by hired assassins 5. For illegal arms dealing: former dwarf lord with connections living in exile in thieves' quarter 6. For kidnapping: giant chambered nautiloid w/mind control powers operating in city sewers 7. For unlawful sorcery: recently sacked sub-vizier, popular astrologer to the upper classes 8. For ESP-detected thought crimes: high priest of minor chaos temple 9. For molestation of a person of greater social station: Gandhi-like hero to the underclasses 10. For extortion: entirety of local shipping guild, services being replaced by navy 11. For failure to honor holy days: retired war hero notable for outspoken skepticism 12. For tax evasion: occupants of the rather scary looking ancient mansion on the hill, surrounded by beast-populated moat w/semi-human figures patrolling grounds by night
 * wantedposter

1,Human obstacle: this hulking fellow, once-great warrior dinged in the helmet by a giant, affable at first, simply will not get out of the way, throngs of city folk sympathetic to his plight give wide berth 1,Artificial sheriff: crude handmade badge of station, tattered raiment in imitation of city constabulary, speech like movie Frankenstein, attempts to place random party member under arrest for crimes indecipherable 1,Lady who SCREEEEAAAMMMSS everything she says, generally gets all the way up in grill before letting loose paranoid diatribe describing current city officials as patsies for vampire cabal 1,Peculiar, slightly smelly fellow with no discernible skills or profession who really wants to be friends very badly, persistent, ingratiating, offers self up as retainer happy to perform the lowliest of tasks 1,Genius street urchin who learned charm person from senile magic user 1,Charming old lady who used to be a badass fighter must eat gold to live, metabolism permanently changed by encounter with the legendary Gold River of the Underworld, she's full of stories but expensive tastes must be indulged 1,Suspiciously pale performer actually controlled by vampire monkey sidekick 1,Ol' Snakepockets: reputable breeder specialising in deadly vipers, literally squirming at all times w/ 2d12 living snakes around neck, up sleeves, in pants, hair, headgear, etc. 1,Mighty-looking beggar warrior w/compulsive gambling issue saving up coppers to get sword out of hock, would appreciate help in exchange for services 1,Street surgeon: expelled from academy for outlandish (frequently correct) theories, highly successful secret practice responsible for refurbishing criminal element, provides healing, cures diseases non-magically, barter system, sewer-level offices stuffed with stolen trinkets/magic items 1,World's smallest halfling, almost a foot tall, massive sideburns, bloated, appears ungainly but scampers like anything, catches rats with teeth, looking for work, voice like James Earl Jones 1,Man under witch's curse: skin perpetually bursts into flames, lives in water filled-barrel, street folk bring him victuals, warm themselves
 * Weirdos